corporate stalker

Tales of a Corporate Stalker

Posted by Jon Nori on October 13, 2009
Company News / 1 Comment

I really probably shouldn’t blog this, but it’s too funny not to share.

There is a woman–let’s call her Mabel–who has been calling Destiny Image over the past couple of months.

She started out calling the sales line, but has graduated to the general office number and punches in random extensions.

“Mabel” seems like a nice woman. She has a strong Boston accent. And she is very inquisitive.

In fact, she asks so many questions that today one of the employees dubbed her “Our Very Own Corporate Stalker.”

Every time Mabel calls she seems to need different information. Today, she was asking for the official job title for one of our Acquisitions Agents (it’s “Acquisitions Agent”) for “correspondence.” Previously, she has asked to speak with the heads of certain departments, she has asked who the managers of certain sales representatives are, and has asked probing questions about our authors and attempted to get personal contact information for them (which, really, is not that unusual).

I can only imagine that she is trying to build some kind of organizational chart of the company.

When asked her name, or queried for contact information, she politely declines to answer or ignores the question completely and continues to ask her questions. A staff member once began to pray for her over the phone, and Mabel began screaming “moron” into the phone.

One of these times, I’m hoping that she gets through to me. I have a whole list of fake names and positions (such as Dr. Green in Trauma Counseling, Westley in Wardrobe, and Asuka in Angelic Warfare) that I would like to add to her list of Destiny Image employees. I’ve also got some choice jokes involving caller ID and reverse name lookups that I’d like to share with her.

It’s rather entertaining, really. I think though that Mabel may need a hobby. Or a pet. Maybe I’ll send her a kitten after the next time she calls. Everyone likes teh kittehs.

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